Nonsensity
by SylverEyes
Summary: Oneshot: Five friends try to figure out what everyone else is saying at an hour when no reasonable teenager should be awake, much less talking. :RaeCy friendship::Rated only for early morning potty mouths::May be incorporated in a collection of oneshots.


So, this little bit of complete nonsense was inspired by (once again) EmaniaHilel. Seriously, if you haven't read her stuff then why are you still here, hm? I pale in comparison! But this was also inspired by my dad and my friend Nora. The two of them are born on the same day, and they have interactions like this all the time. It drives the rest of us nuts, but there ya go. -shrugs-

Disclaimer: -insert witty remark about not owning Teen Titans here-

* * *

Robin wondered how he had gotten himself into this predicament.

It was a beautiful autumn day outside of the tower. Leaves had decided to dance across the wide windows, and crystalline water splashed gently across the shore, as though it couldn't be bothered to make any real effort. The city was quiet, and the last streaks of the night were evaporating in the lush colors that spread across the sky.

Of course, all of this was lost on the team of crime-fighting superheroes who lived in the T on a small island in Jump City's bay.

Initially, the Boy Wonder had been surprised when he had walked into the main room to see that he had company at this early hour. That wouldn't have been unusual, since Raven normally woke up before him, and even sometimes made him his coffee when she was in the mood.

No, what had shocked him into stopping at the door for so long that he was actually smacked as it tried to shut again, was that he did not only have the dark girl for company. All the other titans were up and about too.

Granted, none of them were actually saying much, as, being teenagers, each was pretty much useless until at least eight in the morning, but the fact that they had opened their eyes and dragged their tired butts down to scrounge for some breakfast floored him.

That was not the only thing that caused incredulity from the team leader that morning. For, at the moment, Robin was sitting at the counter eating some French toast that Cyborg had so graciously cooked up for them, and having a verbal sparring match with Beast Boy.

The green changeling was sitting on the counter's surface comfortably, slurping his own glass of soy milk, and expertly countering all of Robin's arguments in a way that could actually be called intelligent.

The teen tried to take into account that it was extremely early in the morning, and his brain hadn't fully woken up, but that fact only contributed to Robin not being able to wrap his mind around a Beast Boy who could not only match everything he was saying in an understandable way, but that he could do it at six thirty in the morning, a time when the young hero was normally still having dreams about being team leader.

It wasn't even a topic that Beast Boy knew more about, like video games, or the anatomies of the animals that he morphed into while they were fighting criminals. No, it was a fair, general, and highly controversial topic.

"All that I'm saying is," Beast Boy said, with an air of one who knew a great many things. "that when it comes right down to it, you can't knock it until you try it, you know?" he took a swig of his milk and looked at Robin, expecting a retort.

Robin frowned, his brow creasing, and tried to come up with something that hadn't already been said. Unable to think of anything, he unclenched his jaw and tried the same, dried out perspective that he had been taking all morning. "It has no point though; no plot, and it doesn't make any sense. Why would someone want to read something that meanders mindlessly?"

Beast Boy looked positively affronted. "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is practically a classic! And it's hilarious. How many times a day do you read a hilarious book, huh Rob? Your nose is always in a detective story; how many of those have made you laugh out loud?"

Robin was saved from trying to think of something smart to say in return when Cyborg put down his newspaper with a firm crinkle and stared at the two boys. "This is weird," he told them bluntly, looking at each in turn. "Robin is losing an argument to B.B. I didn't even know that B.B. knew what the word 'meander' means!"

Starfire laughed as she took another bite out of her waffle drenched in hot sauce. "It seems as though Robin does not have his head completely here, yes?" she smiled at her friends, enjoying her little joke.

Even Raven looked up from her book to cash in on the fun. "Well, we all know that until Robin has been awake for at least two hours, all he can really process is the fact that someone made coffee and it needs to be ingested."

Robin couldn't see the bottom half of her face, as it was hidden behind Wuthering Heights, but he could tell just from her violet eyes that a smirk was settling on her lips as though it belonged there. She had probably stolen it from him.

If he had been given another minute or so, Robin probably could have thought of a decent comeback and snatched the smirk that was rightfully his back from his friend. As it was, his four teammates did not give him sixty seconds to work out what he was going to say, and they chuckled again after a few moments of silence on his part.

Glaring at nobody in particular, Robin turned his attention back to cutting his breakfast into chewable pieces and ignoring whatever words were being sent his way. None were, but just in case, the boy tuned them out anyways.

Beast Boy, realizing that the discussion was over and he had apparently won, turned to Star, not knowing what to do with this new knowledge. Had he been in a more functional state of mind he would had gloated, and never let Robin forget the fact that he had one-upped him.

As it was, Beast Boy was more than a little bewildered, so he settled with scooting along the countertop to the end where his friend was sitting and leaning over her plate, examining what she was eating.

"Do you wish to try some?" Starfire asked brightly, holding out a square of her waffle with a considerable helping of the hot sauce on it on her fork for him to try.

The changeling hesitated. "I dunno Star… it doesn't really look sanitary." He told her, even while he sniffed it cautiously.

Again Raven lifted her eyes to pin Beast Boy to the wall. "Never mind that that word was used incorrectly," she announced snippily, drawing the attention of all the teens in the vicinity. "But this is coming from the one who constantly lives in _your _room?"

The air was let out of Beast Boy and he sulked. "Why can't you just let me win something for once, Rae?" he complained loudly, haphazardly placing his empty soy milk glass on the edge of the marble counter.

Raven used her powers to float the glass over to the sink and deposited it safely. She returned her attention to her younger friend, unable to find the energy to even try and knock him down to a lower peg. It was just too damn early in the morning.

Starfire shared a knowing look with Cyborg, and the two quietly chuckled to themselves. It was a different fight than the one that sometimes shook the tower in the mornings (the cries of 'tofu' and 'meat' had been getting a little old), but it was comforting to know that _someone _was willing to argue at this ungodly hour.

A comfortable silence settled over the five teens. They pursued their morning activities that didn't take much effort to complete, and tried to get up the will power to actually start the day, and maybe get something important or necessary done. But all seemed to be fine with not moving, even after they had finished eating their breakfast or whatever else they were doing.

Raven was the first one to attempt to rouse herself. She blinked and looked up at her friends, having just realized that she had been staring at the same paragraph on the page for over a minute now. The words had begun to effectively blur, telling her that she needed to shake this lax attitude away and wake the hell up.

She had some chores to do anyway. Might as well get the menial things done first and out of the way, so that she could spend any other free time she may have doing something far more enjoyable. The lone thought that she was doing right then was enjoyable was forcefully pushed out of her mind by the empath's logical and organized side.

Raven sighed and shut her book with a soft snap, right in thinking that it wouldn't draw any of the others' attention. Standing and stretching, she looked down to find that she was still in her gray long-sleeved sleep shirt and the plaid flannel pants.

Which reminded her…

"Do you need any help with the T-car today, Cyborg?" asked Raven seemingly out of the blue. Her friends looked up to see that she was gently placing their empty plates in the sink with her black power, as she had done with Beast Boy's glass.

Finding nothing out of the ordinary in her question, Starfire, Beast Boy and Robin went back to whatever had captured their interest before, only half listening to the short conversation taking place around them.

Cyborg looked up from his crossword momentarily. "Sure, you can do the laundry." He told her casually, scratching the back of his head with the end of the pen before filling in more spaces with letter in the newspaper.

And this, Robin thought, had to be the most surprising thing that had happened all morning, including Beast Boy revealing that he did like to read for pleasure, and a real book too, at that.

Three heads snapped up to watch Raven's reaction. She obviously would knock Cy's head for being obscure (because something that far out even an empath couldn't decipher), and they would all get along with their business, living their normal lives.

But the dark girl simply nodded and made her way out of the room, her book floating along behind her, encased in black, glowing magic. The door shut behind her, and the only one who didn't seem to be aware of how the world had suddenly turned itself inside out was Cyborg himself.

He didn't glance up as he asked, "Hey, do any of you guys know what a 'tattered or ragged person' would be? It's a really long word."

When no one answered, or tried to, Cyborg looked up. Three pairs of eyes (or a mask covering a pair of eyes, in Robin's case) stared at him as though he was something repulsive on the bottom of their shoe. The metal man resisted the impulse to check and see if something was in his teeth, preferring to settle for a, "What?"

"Dude!" Beast Boy exclaimed, coming out of his blank stare. "What was that?"

Cyborg looked confused. Robin, too, shook his head to get rid of his mental stalling and raised his eyebrows. Starfire's emerald eyes were puzzled as well, and she glanced around to make sure that she wasn't the only one missing something.

"What was what?"

Starfire took up the explanation/inquiry. "That conversation that you just had with Raven. It did not make any sense. 'You may do the laundry' is not an adequate response to 'I wish to help with the automobile' is it?" she looked to Robin for confirmation.

He nodded to her, agreeing.

Cyborg's face lightened as he now realized what they were asking, but he still couldn't see how any of them were confused. "It's not all that complicated," he told them, shrugging his massive shoulders easily, and attempting to go back to his crossword puzzle.

Robin would not let him. "Well, humor us then." He said, sincerely wondering where his older friend had drudged up the response that he had. "How the hell did you draw the conclusion from Raven's question?"

Cyborg rolled his single flesh and blood eye, and attempted to think through the process that came so easily to Raven and himself.

The two were like a brother and a sister who didn't continually fight, as Raven and Beast Boy did. It hadn't taken long for them to bond, and once they did, it was easy to tell how close they became. You didn't have to be a detective to see how much they cared for each other.

Everyone on the team knew about it, even if they didn't acknowledge it in words. But it was shown in the way that whenever they all watched a movie together, Starfire would move over to make room for Raven to sit next to Cyborg. Or when driving around town for whatever reason, Raven could always choose to be in the passenger seat where she and Cyborg could have their own little discussion, while Robin would try to referee the hyper activeness of the two most energetic members of their team.

Having worked it out, the half metal man returned to the present, shaking his head. It was a bit of a shock to realize that his friends could not work out what the steps in between what he and Raven had said. Then again, if he thought about it more carefully, the two had never really had one of their moments where the others were paying close attention.

Cyborg started from the beginning. "Raven asked whether I wanted help on the T-car, which would have meant that I would be going out today, which would have meant that I would be going to the store because it is a Sunday, which would have meant that I would be getting water bottles to restock in the gym, meaning I would have worked out, meaning that she would need to wait to do the laundry so that my workout clothes could go in the load." He rattled this off in a manner eerily similar to Starfire.

His three friends gaped, not even trying to hide their shock. "I'm not going to work on the T-car, so she can do the laundry." He finished, smiling at them like it was the most obvious thing in the world. To him it might have been.

Beast Boy, surprisingly, was the first to react. "I didn't hear _any _of that!" he told his friend, jumping off the counter and landing on his feet gracefully.

Robin leaned on the counter. "I have to go with Beast Boy on this one," he admitted, loosing lacing his fingers together. "I really don't get how you could have heard that. I mean, in any one of those places your logic could have gone in a completely different direction than what Raven really meant."

Robin's reasoning fell on deaf ears. "I suppose that just means that none of you know her as well as I do." Cyborg told him smugly, picking up his paper to continue with his crossword. It was worth it not to see the look on their faces, just to know that the looks were actually _there_. "I know that's what she meant, and she knows that I understood it. There's nothing more to it than that."

With that Cy had clearly ended the conversation, leaving three teens to doubt the depth of their relationship with a certain empath residing in the same building as them.

Beast Boy leaned over to Starfire (who expression had now expanded to include worried) and muttered into her ear, "That's all crap; he's gotta be making it up."

Robin, overhearing them, leaned their way as well. "I don't know," he sounded as unsure as his words implied. "I mean, _look _at him…"

They did. His face was hidden by the newspaper, but just the casual way he was slouching on his stool and the fact that he hadn't bothered to check and see whether or not they believed him confirmed it; Cyborg was definitely _not _bullshitting his story.

The green changeling looked at his friends. "No way…" he shook his head, opinions firmly set in stone. "That's totally impossible."

"It's not."

All three jumped. Spinning around quickly showed that Raven was standing there, still in her pajamas, with a basket of laundry under one arm. The empath normally did everyone's laundry, something that they had yet to thank her for, although they appreciated it. Wearing the same clothes than you ran around locking villains up in was not something any were inclined to do.

Raven must have been standing there for a long while to have understood the gist of their conversation. Apparently the girl was better than they thought at keeping silent. They had also discovered a new talent of hers: eavesdropping.

Starfire, Robin and Beast Boy took none of this into account as they stuttered and stumbled over their words, trying to find excuses and apologizing all at once. Raven listened to them for a few moments with an amused expression on her face before sauntering over to Cyborg and resting a hand on his shoulder.

He folded his paper in half and met his friend's purple gaze. "Yes?" he asked her easily, half his wit still focused on reading the article currently under his nose.

Raven was not bothered by this as she spoke to him. "How's your room doing?" she asked, a small grin on her face. "Messy?"

Cyborg returned a much larger grin of his own, realizing what the dark girl was doing and deciding to play along, although he did answer the question honestly. "I'm sure I can let Star drag me to the mall today." He told her, a devilish twinkle in his eye.

Starfire was too befuddled to be happy about this small revelation. "I am getting the ache of the head," she told her friends, demonstrating what she meant by holding her head in her hands and resting her elbows on the counter.

Beast Boy's face scrunched up as he tried to make sense of what was going on, but failed. "Dude!" he wailed, hands in his hair. "I'm so confused!"

Robin didn't even attempt to work out what they were saying. "It's too damn early," he said to himself, unwittingly echoing what Raven had been thinking not ten minutes earlier. He wished he had another cup of coffee.

"I need at least three more hours of sleep," the boy wonder muttered, standing and averting his eyes from the sight of his two smiling friends.

He got the nastiest feeling that they were laughing at him.

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

So, yes, a little RaeCy friendship here. Lovely, don't you think?

I must admit, this had got to be the most PWP (plot, what plot?), waffle, pointless, stupid thing I've ever written. It has absolutely no point, came out of nowhere, and totally knocked me off my feet. I suppose that I like it- Cyborg and Raven being a bit mean at the end just tickles me pink. But I feel really dumb for posting up something so useless... oh well.

Oh, and if you realized that this font is different than the font of the actual oneshot don't worry- you're not going insane. I just happen to be lazy, and Documents happened to update itself, so this happened. I'll try to make sure it doesn't happen again, but no promises. Also, sorry for any mistakes you may happen across. This isn't betaed, and I'm a bit tired (it's one thirty in the morning), so I may have missed things.

Readn and review, and you get a hug! Critique and you get a bear hug! Flame, and you get a real bear hug! Sic 'em, Smokey! :)


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